It’s hilarious that non-Americans on Tumblr are all like “OMG DENNY’S TUMBLR MAKES ME WISH I LIVED IN AMERICA SO I COULD EAT THERE,” while us Americans will literally only eat at Dennys if it’s 3 in the morning and we’ve lost control of our life.
theres a giant burning orb in the sky and it can burn your flesh, it can give you diseases, it can kill you, looking directly at it causes physical pain, and we all think this is okay. we like this orb. we like to go outside and lie around on our backs when this orb is in the sky. children draw cute pictures of this levitating death orb with a smiley face on it. what is wrong with us
The first time I played D&D (3.5) I was with a group of mostly new players. We spent most of the night creating characters, learning the basics, and goofing around. By the time we actually started playing it was close to midnight.
Our DM set up a mat with a bunch of spear-toting figurines on them, drew out a rough city alleyway, and placed our chosen figurines in the middle of the bunch. He explains the world and it’s lore, and tells us we enter a city looking for a job and come across a number of homeless people asking for money, and he gestures at the spear wielding figurines. I of course asked why the homeless have spears.
He tells me to ignore it and use my imagination. They are homeless people and they are asking for change. Will you give them any?
I tell him no because they have big scary spears and I refuse to deal with them. He asks the rest of the party, and everyone donates at least one gold, and I eventually cave and give one gold to a nearby beggar.
After everyone had donated, he revealed that the homeless were in fact beggars, and they then proceeded to slaughter our entire party, and that’s how we ended the night. All in all, a great first introduction to D&D.
I’m glad OP had fun but this DM sounds like an arsehole.
Why do people use playmats in non-combat scenarios anyway when it leads to misunderstandings like this?
And more to the point why would the revelation that homeless people asking for money “are beggars” mean they are suddenly hostile when that much was evident to begin with?
Unless they meant “bandits”, but even so, the playmat doesn’t need to come out until they actually start attacking. This just sounds like needlessly confusing a new player to me.
Argh, I did mean to say bandits!
But the DM just wanted to quickly get us introduced to combat in a way that would have flowed nicely into the story (had we won.)
you can blow smoke rings? pretty cool bro but check this out (takes a long drag)(blows a vagina made of smoke)(blows a perfectly formed smoke dick which glides through the air and collides with it)(the smoke coalesces into a smoke baby)(the baby flies through the air and grabs a knife)(as you fight the smoke baby i scream “DID YOU THINK YOU COULD FUCK WITH THE SMOKE WIZARD AND GET AWAY? DID YOU THINK THERE WOULD BE NO RAMIFICATIONS?”)